Back again with added Morphine

I haven't posted for a long time. Mostly because I've been very ill and then recovering for almost a year and was obviously unwell - in retrospect, for some time before acute illness set in. Friends, family and colleagues tell me I look better now than I have done in two years. So that's why I haven't posted for some time. Too toxic and messed up for a year or so before the acute illness and convalescing after.

When I was very ill and in hospital, for reasons I won't go in to I suffered absolutely agonising pain and after 2 shots of pethidine and various oral painkillers which had no effect I requested, and was given intravenous (iv) morphine. The Professor of Surgery looking after me told me that the pain I was feeling was up there equivalent to that suffered during child-birth, heart attack or from kidney stones. Ouch.

Well Sister Morphine's gentle caress did the business. Although the drip ran constantly I could supplement the regular dose with self-administered extra if I needed it - which I did. I didn't find the drug induced euphoria but it did stop me feeling the pain. Although I knew the pain was still there, frankly I didn't care as long as it just stopped hurting. After twenty-four hours the cause of my pain had rested, thanks to Sister M and I only needed one dose of oral morphine after coming off the drip. Then I could cope on ordinary paracetamol-based analgesia.

This was all very interesting from a professional point of view as I had never been on the receiving end of pure pharmaceutical morphine before then. My wife tells me I did blather on for a bit whilst on the drip but subjectively I felt calm and lucid. Also very interesting was the wildly differing attitude of the various nurses taking care of me whilst I was mainlining (in a good way) that fine chemical. One or two of the nurses (all qualified I might add) freaked and kept checking on me every five minutes and ticked me off for self administering. I discovered that despite a limiter I could repeat self-administer after every seven minutes, so I just kept banging away until the pain stopped - much to these nurses' consternation. Other staff were much more relaxed and encouraged me - one even saying that, 'we really need to get on top of this (the pain)'. So from this highly unscientific study it seems that some nurses are terrified of morphine and it being controlled by the patient, whilst others, rightly in my view, see it as the nurses and patients friend.